What Happens When Our Hearts Have Unhealed Pain? 

The first problem [resulting in us looking for greener pastures] is unhealed pain in our hearts. When we are wounded, it’s like a little place in our souls is broken or crushed. The more pain we experience, the more broken our hearts become. Since this process begins in our very early years, many of us grow up accumulating a lot of pain at the hands of others, our environment, our circumstances, and our own self-sabotage. To try to make the pain stop, we self-medicate through addictive living.

As a result, we end up in terrible bondage, wondering how to end the constant turmoil in our hearts. Only Jesus can heal the pain in our hearts. He is the one who came to bind up the brokenhearted (see Isa. 61:1); it’s His specialty. But instead of turning to Jesus for healing, many people try everything else.

In my own life, I spent many wasted years self-medicating for a variety of reasons. Here are at least three:

  1. I was afraid of being vulnerable because I didn’t know how to trust others with my heart. The unhealed filter of my past experiences taught me that the risk of trust would likely result in more injury through judgment, betrayal, and wounding.
  2. At times, my pain was so familiar to me that I couldn’t imagine life without it. Even though it wasn’t helping or working for me, it was what I knew.
  3. At other times, I feared being rejected and thought if people knew the real me or things from my past they would not like me. All this resulted in me rejecting most people before they had a chance to reject me.

Because of these reasons and more, many who seek greener pastures must come to the end of themselves, like the younger son, before they will return to the Father.

This is an excerpt from my new book Loved Like Jesus.

I wrote it because I want you to experience the deep love that your heavenly Father has for you. Living from this reality as a much loved son or daughter, you can rest in a confident connection with Him and experience abundant living and lasting freedom.

Order my book today for yourself and an extra copy for a friend, your pastor and/or your small group.

Be blessed, my friends.

Thanking Him for you,


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